The Inevitable Mom Friends

It's Great To Be Decent

The Inevitable Mom Friends

If she’s not in your life now either she has been before or she will be. Your Inevitable Friend.
Inevitable Friend

She’s the one you honestly don’t like and wouldn’t want to talk to. But your kids are in class together and have chosen to be best friends. Or she sits next to you in the office all day. Maybe her husband works with yours and you occasionally run into her at the grocery store and office functions.

Inevitable FriendShe likes you and is really nice every time you see her. There’s just something about her that grates on your every nerve. Although you’ve never been in a physical fight with anyone, you want to try it with her. You want to hide, play on your phone or otherwise act like you are too busy to see her.  After ten or fifteen minutes your neck and shoulders literally ache with tension.

Why do you feel like this if she’s so dang nice? Maybe she shortens your name to Tiff when you go by Tiffany. Or she lengthens your name to Kimberly when you always go by Kim. Maybe she hugs you when you just aren’t a hugger. Perhaps she Inevitable Friend lets her preschooler stay up all night watching rated R movies and wants your family to hang out with hers, but your family is pretty conservative and strict.  Whatever it is….she’s just not who you want to be friends with.

The problem is that your lives overlap in such a way that it can’t be helped.  This is who Mississippi Man and I call “Inevitable”.  She’s actually been a few different people over the years, but when my husband says “Inevitable”, I can’t help but smile.  It is a secret code between us that the situation is unavoidable and to just grin and bear it.

Inevitable FriendI’m a Decent Mom though, right?  I can be nice for a few hours when life puts us together.  I can’t  be fake though and hug you back or act like we are Mom Soul Mates.   It’s just not in me to do it, I’m sorry.  I’ll deal as politely as I can and have a huge cup of tea and soak in the tub when I get home.

If I am your “Inevitable” please put your hand on my shoulder, look me in the eyes and just say “Inevitable”.  That actually might be enough to make us both laugh and it’ll be at least one thing that we can bond over…because nothing else will.

Have you met Your “Inevitable”?




3 Responses

  1. […] else is doing and compare our styles to theirs.  Instead of dismissing these women as your Inevitalbe Friends, look deeper. They have valuable lessons to teach you and some aspects of their style might […]

  2. […] After months of searching, I realized that having kids the same age and being in the same life stage ourselves is not enough. I made acquaintances with whom I had everything in common: degree plans, prior military service, same number of kids who were also around the same age. Those similarities weren’t enough for us to have that connection or chemistry that Mom Soul Mates should have. I resigned myself to the fact that I probably wasn’t going to find anyone besides the Inevitable Friend. […]

  3. […] not to.  You want to be helpful and that’s wonderful, but now you are the overbearing “inevitable friend“. An experienced Mom respects boundaries even when they are laid down. Now I just want you […]

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